At Least I Remembered to Take a Picture This Time

At least this time it's only hash browns which exploded all across the counter and floor, and it's not shattered glass. This time I was trying to break apart the hash browns that were frozen in a solid mass. Again, my first attempts did not result in disaster so I kept whacking the bag against the counter to break up the last solid pieces. Then, the bag exploded. 

I write this because, really, aren't most of our days (at least for those of us in countries with frozen hash browns easily bought at the grocery store) filled with mundane tasks, some of which go astray? Maybe you don't have as many kitchen mishaps as I do, but it gives you something to chuckle about. Or, the stories resonate with you: "I've had days like that." 

I write to lead me into deeper ways of thinking: I've realized that I multi-task when I cook. I like food. I somewhat like to cook. But, it's not a priority enough for me to focus on it. This, in turn, led me to think what my passions truly are, what do I focus on. 

I write to encourage others. In my last blog (see "shattered glass" in the first paragraph), I wrote about the opposite of loneliness: friendship. Friendship, whether with God or with others, involves "(1) spending time together, (2) learning about the other, (3) being honest and transparent, (4) learning to be a good listener, (5) allowing for changing and maturing views of the other, and (6) learning how to enjoy being silent together" (Gary Moon's forward in Trevor Hudson's book Beyond Loneliness as Moon quotes *James Martin's insights from **William A. Barry).  

Social media can not replace the face-to-face time, but it can be, when used in encouraging ways, be a moment in time where we can feel that we have been seen and heard and loved. I so appreciated the give and take when my own daughter posted her "When Days Seem Hard" It was just what one mom needed to hear so that she could pick herself up and begin again. 

Loneliness can't be cured by social media, blogs, etc., but I hope I can use technology positively to invite myself and others into a friendship with God (the great thing is God is available during poopy diapers, academic meetings, traffic jams...in other words all the time), and into exploring ways of friendship with three-dimensional people (did I choose the right term...lol...geometry was never a focus of mine). For me, it takes intentionality. To not give up when lives seem so busy. To look at my schedule and see where I can give up something simply time-consuming and replace it with friendship. I'm interested in the creativity used by others to build friendships (so feel free to comment), and, if you're interested in an online Beyond Loneliness online community (not as a substitute, but as a starting point), here is the link to the book club. 

*The Jesuit Guide to (Almost) Everything: A Spirituality for Real Life by James Martin, SJ
** God and You: Prayer as Personal Relationship by William A. Barry, SJ

The Opposite of Loneliness

Lately I've been exploring loneliness. Some experiences come unbidden, but this one came by way of a book club...or so I thought as I read the opening pages: loneliness of leadership responsibility, loneliness of superficial relationships, loneliness of depression, loneliness of loss, loneliness without a face. Check and double check. Ready to take a quiz. 

All academic until I rode home after spending four days with my daughter, son-in-law, and grandson who live seven hours away from me. 

What a beautiful picture this is of community, fellowship, friendship IF it goes beyond the picture taking moments, right? Two days after this picture was taken, I had all those traveling hours to realize the loneliness of the loss I was experiencing. To be away from this family meant being with sons and granddaughters; to be with this family meant loss of time with the other family members. 

I've been learning lately how to ask questions of God rather than telling God how to run my world (imagine that!). So, I asked. And, I received: Be grateful. Yes, gratefulness did lighten my heart. Yet, what about the loss that can not be lightened by a visit: death of a loved one, death of a situation. So many thoughts came flooding in. And, God said, "Sit with me in it." 

Sit? Do nothing? It's not "doing nothing." To sit with God is to sit in friendship. To sit being heard, being seen, being understood. That, I think is the opposite of Loneliness. Not as an Internet search gave: "popular", "sociable" as the opposite for "lonely" (several sites had no antonyms for "loneliness"). One site "got it": "companionship" is the opposite of loneliness. 

I realize now how my world opened up when I sat with these thoughts. I see the value of the closing words of encouragement from my teacher, Trevor: "Admitting our loneliness, whether it has a face or not, can be liberating, hopeful, and life-giving. That's why I encourage others to face their loneliness and to be honest with themselves. At the beginning of this chapter, we imagined Jesus walking the streets where we live and saying, "Come to me, all you who are lonely, and I will give you friendship" (30-31). 

God Comforts Me

Have you ever gone back to something you have written and discovered how many mistakes you have made? That's what I did this morning. I looked back over yesterday's post, and I counted at least five errors. (Yes, former students, the green ink flowed freely -- in my mind -- over the page.)Of course, the mistakes were made in a post read by more than the usual number of readers (more than my mom and best friends). I wrote: "get on on" instead of "get it on my Kindle." The whole post focuses on the compassionate life, yet I wrote "the contemplative life ascribes value"; it certainly may in other contexts, but I intended to write "the compassionate life ascribes value to everything the Creator has created." I did not even copy the psalm down correctly. It makes more sense for "grain" to go to the eater instead of "great." And, heavens oh heavens, I lacked enough transition between the "trees of the field clapped their hands" and Jesus caring for the least of these. He does care for the trees but the least of these are people who society undervalues.  

Can I blame it on listening to the thud of pieces of my beautiful tree falling to the ground as I typed yesterday? Each time the house rattled, my dog sitting inside with me would start howling.I felt like joining her. I do realize this situation pales in comparison to tragic situations going on throughout the world. It even pales in comparison to some circumstances in my life last year, in the last five years. However, the image of this beautiful tree now cut down symbolizes fairly well changes, large and small, tragic or just disruptive.

My original plan was to practice a particular thread or stream of life one day and write about it the next. As I went about my day yesterday, I wondered how I was going to write about the spirit-filled life in a practical way. Yes, the Spirit is practical; yes, there are plenty of stories to tell; however, how to convey those stories without sounding crazy or prideful right now seems beyond my skill level. 

I decided to return to Frank Laubach's letters, and throw in some interesting passages from a new-to-me author, Trevor Hudson. I'll start with Trevor's first. 

"During the '70s and '80s some readers may recall an explosion of interest in the holy Spirit around the world. The so-called charismatic movement brought renewal to the lives of millions of Christ-followers. Many people, including myself, found themselves experiencing God in a new, fresh, and living way. Strikingly, a number of church leaders in South Africa who stood at the forefront of the struggle against apartheid at that time also participated in this wave of the Spirit. Involvement in the struggle for justice taking place on the streets required an empowerment that only the Spirit could give. This interest in God's Spirit also manifested unhelpful aspects. its focus on experiencing the Spirit led many into a search for mere spiritual thrills. We may find ourselves easily titillated by various phenomena when it comes to openness to the Spirit. Congregational division surfaced around these phenomena. One negative aspect was the casual way in which people sometimes referred to the Spirit. I still remember being asked, "Have you got it?" I never felt sure of how to answer. While I knew the person was referring to the Holy Spirit, sometimes I would jokingly say, 'Of course, I have got it. Why do you think [my wife] married me?" 

"Speaking of the Holy Spirit as an "it" suggests that the Spirit is some kind of invisible force or impersonal power or abstract influence. However, if this were really so, we would be unable to relate personally to the Spirit. Nor could the Holy Spirit guide, comfort, or lead people, which the Bible describes as activity of the Spirit. But even more sadly, regarding the Holy Spirit as an "it" encourages people to do and say some terrible things; often manipulating others to bring about desired effects" (19-20). 

These thoughts cause me to want to be particularly cautious when discussing the Spirit-filled life. I think I can safely write that the Holy Spirit comforted me yesterday in a number of ways. For the sake of safety, my husband and I were told the redwood tree would have to be cut down in small pieces; yet, they were able to cut them down in large enough sections for us to have something of remembrance made out of the wood. My student and I had ordered her textbooks on Monday using regular delivery; yet, they arrived within two days enabling us to start studying. My daughter's box of gifts arrived yesterday. Some want to say those are all coincidences. That's okay. It is also the Holy Spirit's job to reveal Himself; I don't have to force Him on anyone. Now, for Frank Laubach's letter of 7 October 1930. 

"It is the spirit of greed which Jesus said God hated more than any other. It is so diametrically opposite to the spirit of God. For God forever lavishes His gifts upon the good and bad alike, and finds all His joy in endless giving." 

Where Are You? -- Day 14 of Advent

Poor Mary and Joseph. Much of the gain they had made was taken away when the youngest granddaughter came over and moved them back to the Little People house. It took me awhile to find them. "KK," I said, "Where are Mary and Joseph?"

I didn't know this was what I was going to write about today. I had actually planned two days ago on going a different direction, but then Mary and Joseph got lost, and suddenly I find myself writing about "Where are you; where am I, this Advent season?" I was very tempted to add in a joke about not asking directions, but I won't go there.  We all get lost or decide to return to the familiar in our journeys toward the unknown.  

And, God, ever so gracious, comes seeking us. Today, I want to treat you to the words of two of my favorite authors. The first, Trevor Hudson and the second, Frank Laubach.

"The other day I listened to someone tell the story of his spiritual journey. He described how, after years of searching in different directions, he had eventually found God. I had mixed feelings about his use of the phrase 'found God.' On the one hand, there is a certain truth to this. We do search for God. On the other hand, we are also the ones who hide away. Nonetheless God is always trying to find us. This is the good news of the creation story. When we hide from God, God comes seeking, calling out to each one of us, 'Where are you?'

"This question leads us deeply into the searching heart of God. It reminds us that God always pursues us in love. Nothing can ever extinguish the flame in God's heart that burns to be in personal relationship with us. Even when we mess up and get terribly lost. When God asks us where we are, it is as if God is saying to you and me, 'Where are you? I am missing you. My heart aches for you. I want to reconnect intimately with you. I grieve over the distance between us. I long for your companionship, and I will search for you until I find you'" (Questions God Asks Us).

Almost 80 years prior to Hudson writing, Frank Laubach wrote: "I walk out in the street full of Moros, and if my soul is as full of God as it sometimes is, I see what happens as I look into their eyes and pray for them. No man need try to persuade me that God does not reach them, for I see the thing happen, and now I know that every person we ever meet is God's opportunity if only, if only we were not so much of the time shut off from God.

"Last Monday was the most completely successful day of my life to date so far as giving my day in complete surrender to God is concerned -- though I shall hope for far better days -- and I remember how as I looked at people with a love God gave, they looked back and acted as though they wanted to go with me. I felt then that for a day I saw a little of that marvelous pull that Jesus had as He walked along the road day after day, 'God-intoxicated' and radiant with the endless communion of His soul with God'"(15 June 1930).

When God asks me, "Where are you?" oh, that I may reply, whether I am waiting or traveling, "Here, Lord! Right here, clinging to You!" And, may I, as I cling to Him,  look with His same love at everyone else with me on this journey called life.

* artwork from beliefnet.com