Saturday, November 30, 2019

Apologizing (Girl, Stop Apologizing by Rachel Hollis)

I have no apologies for not writing the past eight months. My sister died in May and withdrawal turned out to be my way of grieving; so to dear friends and acquaintances, I have thought of you; I do love you; and loving you from afar worked for my health and sanity as I navigated this new normal.

When I first made notes for this post, I thought it would be not an eulogy / sort of an eulogy. In a way all of my writing this day forward will reflect in some way the loss of my closest friend. I write that not to slight my other siblings or friends, but my sister Becky was my first friend and no one can ever take that position. Up to this point, she had been my longest endearing friend, and, someday, other siblings will pass by the number of years the two of us had together.

This return to writing does include both a review of the book Girl, Stop Apologizing, and a change in my signature pieces in each blog piece. I'm subtracting the "What I Would Do Differently" and the "Transformation" sections and going for a direct "Out of the Box" addition...with no apologies. Also, with no apologies, I'm leaving the former sections in the past and not going back and editing, even though I may not even have those same feelings or thoughts anymore.

Richard Rohr writes in Falling Upward (review to come later): "The supposed achievements of the first half of life have to fall apart and show themselves to be wanting in some way, or we will not move further. Why would we?"(xix) Why would we if we think we have it all together?

I happened to see this book Girl, Stop Apologizing at the local library during a time when I was ready to think about what I wanted my days to look like. I bookmarked Hollis's section on "Choose One Dream and Go All In" I liked the idea of closing my eyes and imagining the best version of myself. Pages 98 through 107 almost make it worth buying the book.

There's some solid ideas to remember, encouragement we've probably read from other authors as well, about comparisons, shame, guilt, boundaries; however, as one really good comprehensive review on Goodreads mentions (by Johanna), Hollis has some troubling issues in this book: pop culture references (continual), a lot of privileged feeling, ambivalence on weight and looks, just some things that feel a little off. I'm not expecting an apology; I'm just writing for me, there were parts I liked and parts that felt off.

I'm stopping here (with no apologies) because it's my first attempt back at writing and posting. This book is actually something like #67...way over my 52 books in 52 weeks, but I chose this one because of the title. My hope is to get back to reviewing all the books read from April through November.